I forget who originally posted this, but it is SOLID. I know I've been guilty of them (particularly 1, 4, & 5), and unlearning them has been a big, big part of taking control of my social self:
As horrible as it sounds to me to say it, a really big part of my development has revolved around learning when, and how, and why, to push people away -- and, for that matter, learning when to be okay with being pushed away. In some senses (some senses) it has arguably made me a better friend.
Five Geek Social Fallacies
Social fallacies are particularly insidious because they tend to be exaggerated versions of notions that are themselves entirely reasonable and unobjectionable. It's difficult to debunk the pathological fallacy without seeming to argue against its reasonable form; therefore, once it establishes itself, a social fallacy is extremely difficult to dislodge. It's my hope that drawing attention to some of them may be a step in the right direction.
1. Ostracizers Are Evil
2. Friends Accept Me As I Am
3. Friendship Before All
4. Friendship Is Transitive
5. Friends Do Everything Together
(More...)
As horrible as it sounds to me to say it, a really big part of my development has revolved around learning when, and how, and why, to push people away -- and, for that matter, learning when to be okay with being pushed away. In some senses (some senses) it has arguably made me a better friend.
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